It had only been a year since Jane had last been in Novus but time had passed. She was not as young as she once had been, though she still had not passed a decade on earth. She was young, and spry, and full of energy, but there was something of the darkness that had slid into her and taken purchase of her golden eyes. They were no longer the honey of a bee’s flank, but the calm burn of amber. Night had taken hold of her, just as the Vogelsteins once had. To think that only a year ago, just a bit more than, she had been a young maiden living in the shacks and hide aways of the Day Court.
She had gained it back. She had bowed and written to her mother and begged, and alas it had been received. Jane had made her way back home, but her presence had not been long. A whirlwind meeting with the older cousin of that same knight who had once damned her, proved to be a marriageable match. He had proposed, and they had wed, and then life had… carried on. Life, and Jane, had continued to breathe and move.
She had gained her place once more in that court that had once adored her. The gossip and laughter had followed her, just as it had used to, but the tongues were now more barbed than they had ever been. Of course, Jane could not take up her position at the flank of the Queen, but she had been in the palace. And her husband, Isaar had been her mate and all had been good.
At first, at least, it had been good. She had got the jewels and the wishes and everything. Her name had been no longer associated with shame. She lived, once more, in the light.
Now, she was in the cool Spring of Delumine. She had been here once before, when she was a girlthing. The red flowers of the meadows brushed against her hocks, kissed her tender pelt. She couldn’t help but shiver at a wayward wind, no longer used to it. Stalls had been set up at regular intervals, sending from them the scents of food and drink and horseflesh. This was a busy place.
She pulled her coat tighter around her frame, soft velvet and mink pressing down against her throat as she pushed away some of the last winter chill. Jane lowered her head and stepped forward through the gates, quiet as a ghost.
Visions of your pretty face send me into hyper space
Caught up in a palentary world
The star was pacing. Up ahead she could see that nasty stallion approaching Tori, and immediately the universe felt wrong. She felt it in her belly as she watched them together, watched the way the stallion looked at the dappled, antlered lady. Mars was frowning slightly, and the universe was filled with whispers, with warnings, and in a moment of pure instinct, the star had taken a single step forward to burst them apart . . . only to remember she couldn't do that to Tori. Tori needed to make her own choices, her own decisions. And she had expressed a need to speak to the stallion. So Veil allowed her the time, and instead wandered around where she was close enough to rush to Tori's side if her friend needed her.
It was a difficult position to be in. Sighing, she moved towards a stall, shaking her head lightly as she glanced about, trying to distract her. That's when she saw the faintest hints of gold. So soft it was line vinework against the night sky. Veil spun around, unwilling to believe her eyes. The figure she'd been MISSING for almost a YEAR NOW was just meandering through, cloak pulled tight, fancy and done up. Veil frowned, not sure if she could really believe the ghost come to life was her. Veil shook her head, hearing the faint chains and crystals clink against her skin from where Tori had tied them delicate chains and bells into her mane. The star approached slowly, her gaze startled, uncertain. Jane?
As she approached, she was suddenly absolutely certain it was whom she thought, and with out any hesitation, the star, dressed in silks, and bells and crystals for the event was rushing forward, practically tackling her wayward friend into a hug, Where have you been? Do you know how worried I was? You were just gone. Like you never existed! There one moment, gone the next, I worried you had DIED! You couldn't have even just sent a note, let me know you were okay!? The star pulled back, pink galaxy eyes narrowing faintly, You're alright? You're well? Not hurt?" She asks then, before her muzzle softens, lips pulling into a gentle smile, It's so good to see you again. How long are you back for? She asked cautiously, the celestial lady suddenly not sure she wanted to get her hopes up that her friend was back for good.
Especially since it would be clear that she wasn't the same new-to-earth star that Jane had left behind.
Jane stopped by a stall for pastries. They were small, folded pieces of dough with star anis in the centre of them. When she inhaled, Jane was met by the cloying scent of spice and burnt sugar. Her stomach was suddenly so empty and so void. In the back of her brain, Jane was aware of Isaar a few lanes away. He had cme for the festival but would soon be going into the city itself for political discussion.
They were here to stay.
Jane didn’t know if she felt joy or guilt. Both, probably. She had not alerted one of her return, just as she had not notified of her departure the year before. Delumine and Novus itself seemed to burn against her eyes and her body; the grass was too cold against her hocks and the sugar- the sugar was burning-
Jane pulled her gaze away and felt her skin shiver. Golden vines seemed to constrict around her dark form; pulling her skin taut as a snake might do its prey. She could hear the lashing of wind in the background, discussions in languages that she was no longer privy to. Relationships, drama, foals and enemyships. She felt tears springing to her eyes, although she tried desperately to shove them away.
We shouldn’t have come here. She had half a mind to run after Isaar and demand for the next ship out. But she knew what he would say. She knew that he would look at her with those sad black eyes and he would say in that gruff, endingless voice, Oh, Jane. Full of compassion, of the paternal pity that he so often employed when she came with a complaint.
She shook her head, painfully aware of the way that her eyelids stung. She was so aware of every sensation, but she still did not notice the slow approach of chains and bells.
Jane?
A half unfamiliar voice broke her from her stupor and Jane spun as though attacked. She wondered if she would see Isaar but no. Of course not. Because standing before her was a young maiden- although young would hardly be the right term for her.
(Veil had been so young and so old at once, Jane recalled.)
The entire universe stood before Jane, a bundle of stardust and galaxies, with those beautiful indescribable eyes that Jane had felt such unending affection for. Like a young sister, someone who made Jane feel like she was better than she was. Who made Jane feel selfless and kind- these traits were no longer attributes that she used for herself, not since everything.
Jane blinked and then Veil was rushing forward and capturing Jane in an embrace. Jane, meanwhile, felt a burning numbness inside her chest as the young mare caressed her with all those little memories that had passed between them. Jane quietly dipped her muzzle so that she could return the embrace as words rushed over her with so little meaning. She’s speaking.I said I would help her to speak, but she’s talking now and she did it without me. That’s good, that means she’s- that’s good. That’s good.
Jane smiled despite the sudden burning in her throat and pulled Veil closer for the millisecond before Veil had pulled back and looked at her with those celestial eyes.
It took a moment for the words to settle in Jane’s mind.
“You’re…” Jane paused, her words shivering as they slipped past her lips. “Oh- how long am I staying- I don’t know.” Jane smiled, “I think it will be a while. My husband…” She slid her gaze up, thinking about him. “I think we’re living here now- I was going to message you after I settled, I…”
Foolish. Damn, damn, damn. A year of no contact and Jane couldn’t even formulate a whole sentence. A person she cared about and loved was here, deserving of so much more, and Jane couldn’t even give her the bare minimum. Shame burned in her cheeks, she felt so small. "And you? Are you just here for the festival?"
@[Veil Nebula] / speaks oh no jane has issues now
02-23-2022, 06:21 AM - This post was last modified: 02-23-2022, 06:22 AM by Jane
Visions of your pretty face send me into hyper space
Caught up in a palentary world
Veil had just a hard time believing what her own eyes told her. Evem as she slowly watched the mare turn, she still just couldn't believe it was really her. Veil blinked once or twice, half afraid she'd open her eyes to see her gone, a mere figment. There's pain in her chest, unsettling, and bubbling. A subtle boil of fear and apprehension. But she ignores it to embrace the friend she has been missing for so long, hugging onto the taller mare with a desperateness that foretold of her fear she would disappear again.
She finally feels the embrace return, pulling her tighter, before they released, and she stepped back. She frowns to here that Jane isn't sure how long she will be about, but that pain doubles in her chest when she hears that word, husband, of them living elsewhere. Veil looks away when she mentioned sending a message . . . unwilling to listen to what she already assumed would have been a lie. Did Jane truly forget about her? Had that been what had happened? Now she was married, living in Delumine. Congratulations on your marriage." The words feel hollow, unfamiliar, and suddenly Veil wishes she was pressed to Tori's side, with her gentle voice, reassuring eyes to calm her down. Where the chiming of those bells tangled in her antlers would chase her fears away.
At least the swirling emotions in her belly when she was with Tori felt light than this cold chill that was now encompassing her body. But still Veil put on her best smile, tilting her head, Well, I'm glad things are working out for you then. And then she blanks. Is she here for just the festival. Veil pauses, hesitating, She spends her time between so many places, but with out a place of her own, truly, and it's never more obvious in that time. A star passing through the night, momentarily brightening the world, before gone and a memory.
Was that what she was destined to be now, for Jane. A memory of a previous time, when it was them against the world. Battling to prove themselves, that they didn't need anyone . . . and now Jane was dressed in finery, with a husband, and Veil never felt so small. The slight shake of her head brings her attention to the sound of the crystals, the bells that have been woven into her mane with the assistance of Tori, and she's reminded she's not as alone as she things. So she smiles instead, I am spending the festival with Torielle, a friend. Her gaze travels to the dappled mare, talking with the stallion, and in that moment the star frowns, But she had to meet with someone . . . So I'm exploring on my own for a bit. But I've become fairly nomadic these days. Going where the universe guides me. She adds with a small smile. It sounds better than 'I'm homeless, because I couldn't afford our apartment by myself.' Instead she simply smiles, and adds, But I do spend a number of hours up at Veneror Peak, or in the libraries with Tori.
The sight of the other mare made Jane taste bitterness. Everything was so bitter, so- so ruined. Jane could feel the tender sense of panic in her breast as Veil held her close. Jane knew how much emotion was there, but how could she access it? It lay behind the acidic taste of regret, something that had been cultivated in Jane ever since she left. She did all the things she was supposed to, she was the housewife and the companion and she did her duty in serving the queen but what else was she? A gossip mill, a finished story for her family. Her husband was a sad old noble with no chance of offspring, and everyone knew it. Jane would never be a mother.
Veil seemed to be good? Jane hoped so, it was the least she could ask for after everything that had happened. She deserved that. Veil had always been so good and kind and sweet and- and-
She was so much better than Jane deserved. She was so much better than Jane, period. And the knowledge of that made Jane want to pull away, to run back onto that ship and disappear. But she could not- the truth was that Jane felt intense fear at the sight of her old friend- old friend, as though they had not nearly been sisters, as though they were not family.
“You’re talking now,” Jane whispered. She could not bear for Veil to see her cry, instead biting the back of her tongue where it wouldn\t be noticed. It was at least partially successful in driving down the heat from her face and from her eyes. Jane had shouldered all her feelings when they had been together, and for her to fall to pieces now would be the real kick in the ass that she needed. “I’m sorry- I mean-”I’m sorry. For everything. Jane felt the words like millstones around her dark neck.
I’m glad things are working out for you.
Cruel laughter settled itself deep in Jane’s chest, and she found herself having to speak around it. “Thank you. I’m very happy.” The urge to laugh only increased as she heard those words. What good was it, anyway? What right had she to be happy, after all she had done.
Veil seems to pause at Jane’s words, frozen in place. The pink eyes search for an answer, as if she too is dealing with all the uncertainty. Jane watched her search until she finally found something to say and seized it.
“Torielle… It's good you're with someone.” Jane followed Veil’s gaze to where a mare was making conversation with a stallion. She had an amount of jewellery held by a pair of impressive white antlers. Jane turned her attention back to Veil, and bit the inside of her cheek. Fairly nomadic, Veil said. Jane was not an idiot.
“I tried to send money back to you, I thought-” her voice caught and she pulled her head up, looking away. “My life is very different. I stay at court most of the time and talk to the other wives about what the queen is wearing or who’s having an affair- very important matters, clearly.” Jane laughed so low it was almost a whisper. “But my husband- Isaar. He’s back here as a diplomat, and as an academic so he can write about the Novans and report back. I imagine it’ll be a number of years that I’m back here- it takes a long time to understand a people…”
Her voice trailed off as she looked once again at Veil. Of course, the celestial being knew everything about the problems of understanding a society. Jane knew them as well, knew their sickening constraints and bindings and how awful it was to not know. Isaar, on the other hand, seemed to embrace it. He had been at ease since they’d reached Novus, had made haste in going to talk to the ‘locals’ of Novus. Jane wanted to roll her eyes at the thought.
“Would you like to get something to drink? Coffee? I'll pay.” Jane pulled her voice under control.
@[Veil Nebula] / speaks this actually hurt a little!
Visions of your pretty face send me into hyper space
Caught up in a palentary world
Veil was struggling, if she was being honest. Her chest, her stomach, her mind was a mess of chaos. Chaos about what she should feel, should experience, should accept. And yet she couldn't resist the touch of a friend who she had thought was to be so much more than that to her. A sister, family, together against the world. And now, it was something so much different. Now she felt like she was trying to greet a stranger. Jane's whisper had the star awkwardly smiling, dipping her head the affirmative. I am. She agreed quietly, hesitating, knowing this had been something they had intended to accomplish together. The apology was like sandpaper on open wounds, but Veil smiled through it none the less, Don't worry, you had things to accomplish . . . and I found friends to assist me. And ultimately, my voice, my speech was present all a long, it just took me recognizing who I was, despite feeling out of place for so long.
Even now she wanted to protect Jane from heart ache. The female did not sound happy however, not truly when she spoke. But the way she said, it sent awkward chills down the star's spine. This was the conversation between strangers. 'How are you' 'I am fine' 'Congratulations, you're married now.' 'Thank you, we are happy.' 'Have a good day.' 'You too.' Was this what the friendship, their relationship had come to now - the awkward, difficult conversations of strangers, ships passing through the night with little more than a blared horn in greeting. I'm glad. the celestial woman whispered around her dry throat.
The name of softness, and warmth, and dappled skin and light touches filled her mind, settled her heart gently, as she glanced towards the mare speaking with . . . that beast. Perhaps it was a good think Jane had approached her, distracting her from the interactions Tori was having with the stallion the universe was frowning at. That Mars sneered at. That the stars disaligned for. The whispers of her brethern in the back of her mind spoke of worry, concern, echoing her desire to ram her way between the two. Torielle is wonderful. She agrees, turning her attention back to Jane, smiling past the awkwardness that was mixing with poison in her belly. She has been helping me adjust to the mortal realm, to be less . . . celestial being, and more easily assimilating with the equine species. The star tries not to flinch, hearing how those words came out, came to be. Sister, do you intend to keep such awkward interactions alive? Sister, be calm, Sister, lower your energy. Sister, it will be okay. Whispers of other stars settling her heart, echoing in the back of her mind. Always watching, always present nowadays.
She had missed that about the universe, how they were all interconnected. Veil looks at Jane as she spoke of trying to send money back, of her life being different now. Of being parts of the court, talking to other wives - of royalty and scandal. She speaks of the husband, of Isaar, a diplomat on a mission in Novus. That they'll be around a while, of the time it would take to get to know those who call this land home. Veil's gaze had dropped again, swallowing hard. Jane's new family . . . did it even have room for her, did she still have a place in her sister's heart? Veil lightens her gaze, lifting her head and smiling gently, ears perking slightly, Torielle lives here, in Delumine. I am not very familiar with all the land has to offer, but I should be happy to point out of the well known locations, the library, where Queen Callynite tends to frequent. She offers instead, as if she were just the hired help to a grand lady.
What place did she have to squeeze back into Jane's life. She was a lady of the courts now, the wife of a diplomat. Veil was a nomadic monk, travelling between the mountains, Delumine; and anywhere she might feel drawing her attention. Beside the mare now, she felt out of place, in silk and satin scarves, and bells and crystals, like a nomadic gypsy, wild and free. Where she had felt like she easily could stand next to Torielle, who wore her own grand assortment of bells that chimed with each step, she felt like a peasant, even if a colorful one, next to the woman draped in mink and velvet, as if she had a status to show off in appearance alone.
Then the olive branch is offered, and in that moment Veil wants nothing more than to grasp it, to hold onto it tightly. She nods, a small smile, That would be lovely. Come, one of the Night medics is offering coffee and tea, and I've yet to find anyone whose wears are better. She offers, leading the way to the Night Court fae, whose table was busy, but a never ending supply of teas, coffees and pastries were on display. Veil motions Jane forward, walking through the crowds with out hesitation, smiling kindly to Caelum, as the fae asked what they would like, A fruity tea, what ever you have that is sweet. And one of the cheese and berry pastries. My friend here is paying. The star says, a hint of a playful smile towards Jane, motioning for her to put her order in, before nodding to a cleared spot beneath a tree, blankets and pillows laid out for those who need a rest, shaded from the sun, We can sit beneath the tree there, perhaps . . . If that is alright with you? Close enough to keep an eye on Tori, in case the universe screamed for an intervention, far enough away that both conversations could be kept separated, and Veil could focus on Jane
What was there for Jane that she could say, to convey just how much Veil meant to Jane. To portray the pain that she was feeling in this situation. She was achingly aware of the awkwardness between them, but if she was being honest it was because she could barely get a word out. Her entire chest, her person burned with regret and misery as she looked upon this person that she had betrayed.
How could Jane convey that part of the reason that she had dropped contact was not because she didn’t want to know Veil, but because she didn’t want Veil to know her. Jane’s vibrancy and youth had gone as soon as the summons of her parents was accepted. She was followed, always, by the dog whose name was Failure, and her blood lay thick along its jaw.
Jane had thought she could get it back, when she went home. But she had had nothing- it didn’t take more than an hour for her to realise her painstaking naivete, that everything was gone- if it had existed. In the end, Jane made no attempts to get it back as she came to the terms that, simply, she did not think she deserved to have it back.
She had failed herself.
Jane had tasted knowledge once, in the kingdom of Novus. Standing in the woods she had looked up at a library full with knowledge older than the oldest mind alive. She had tasted it, she had been- tempted. Even with the expulsion from her family, Jane had finally felt the subtle liqueur of freedom, even though it smelt of sweat and hunger. It had also smelt like stardust.
You had things to accomplish. The words only scraped harder against Jane’s conscience. It wasn’t alright, it wasn’t okay, she’d ruined everything. What right did she have to Veil’s conversation, even right now? Where was Isaar?
She had come to recognise his sick loneliness. He had lost his true love, he had named early on We will not love each other and he had been right. The thing that had bonded them, however, had been true and utter self revulsion. His had been for acts that he never named for Jane, war acts and atrocity that he had surely seen. Hers, in comparison, were smaller. Still, the two would sit each night in true silence, unending silence that seemed to last forever- united in their coupled misery.
Jane smiled, trying to be happy as she looked to the antlered mare. She heard the way Veil’s words were stilted. “And she’s- she’s good to you? I hope you know that if she ever- if anyone ever does anything to you I’ll kill them.” She coughed at the last words, stumbling a bit. Humiliation and embarrassment burned even brighter in her voice.
Veil mentioned helping Jane out in terms of locations. It was a dead conversation, despite everything, and yet Jane clung to it and the possibility of future interactions. “Please” Jane started to say, but then interrupted herself, clamping her teeth shut around the hiss of the ‘s’. Her eyes widened, analysing her own words. True panic and terror spread through her body, a rabid self disgust that worked its way up through her veins. Please what? Please stay? Please- what right do you have to ask anything of her? That’s right, you have nothing. “I mean- I would really like that.”
But Jane’s own offer was accepted, and the two of them were soon walking towards a stall owned by a short pegasus with butterfly wings. Jane listened to her friend, her sister, speak and felt herself relax a little. Maybe, just maybe, things could be okay.
But no- no- Veil did not deserve that. Did not deserve Jane- Jane was not what she had been.
“I’ll uh- I’ll have the same, thank you,” she said to the faelike server. She then followed Veil’s inquiry and nodded, smiling. “That’d be lovely.”
@[Veil Nebula] / speaks cries i just love them :cccc
Visions of your pretty face send me into hyper space
Caught up in a palentary world
If I was being honest with myself, this entire situation made me feel weird. My stomach seemed to flip flop and rise up into my throat. It felt like all the universe was trying to shove itself into my body, but with no success. Just a mess of weight that made me feel sick, and wanting to hide in a corner. I just couldn't fathom where this was supposed to go, what I was supposed to do here. Staring with my once friend, my once sister before me; I wondered if I even knew her anymore. Did she know me? Where we nothing more than strangers that once knew one another. I had always assumed that when I found her again, when Jane would come home, it would be a touching reunion. My eyes would leak with joy, and I would embrace her, and show her off to all my friends and it would be normal, and happy, and right . . . My sister, my first sense of family; would finally come home.
How odd to imagine that now I wondered if she would disappear from my life and we would be passing stars in the expanse of space. Close enough to feel the heat of the other, but strangers that hardly spare a glance. A meteor striking through my world, briefly lighting up my sky with a familiar sense of home, and then gone for the next hundred thousands of years. The star felt so out of place, that it continued to just feel worse. Like a black hole was opening up in her chest and threatening to consume her, all awkward, uncomfortable and uncertain for just how this reunion would conclude.
But this, this was even worse. Because she wasn't the only one awkward, and from what her magic was telling her, Jane was so filled with revulsion, that it pained Veil to the core. It's hard to work out the emotional cues her magic informs her others are feeling, but she knew in her heart that revulsion wasn't pointed her way . . . which meant the one Jane was so disgusted by . . . . Jane's smile looked wrong, but even with her gaze turning towards Tori, Veil felt the desire to pull Jane into a hug. She blinks at the thought of someone killing someone for her. Of course, she's a very good friend. She does her best to assist me in understanding this world. Why would she ever do anything bad to me? For a brief moment the naive star who still was unfamiliar to the world, and the way relationships worked broke through, so obviously unaware of what made her star shine brighter around Tori, what made the butterflies flutter, what made the world so beautiful to her.
But still, Veil forced herself to assist, to offer her help to another, a desperate plea to promise more time out of Jane, a chance to rebuild, a chance to fix this broken familial tie they had developed. But at Jane's reaction, Veil felt her star sputter in her chest, a rush of ice run through her body as she worried if that break of please was a decision not to spend time with her. Her words were the opposite, and she pauses, reaching towards Jane, before hesitating, swallowing hard, Of course. Any time you need my assistance, I will be happy to help. She stated quietly, before walking towards a tea shop, taking her drink, leading the way to the tree, and laying down, Jane . . . Her voice trails off suddenly, and this time, there is a glimmer of wetness in her eyes.
Jane, we . . . we are still friends, family - aren't we? This . . . this isn't how it's going to be? The words came in a rush, as the star seemed to fold in on herself, the stardust seeming to drop off to the barest minimum of shedding as she stares down at the ground, You're . . . you're my sister, my first friend . . . She looks up, those pink galactic eyes focusing on Jane, unshed tears welled up, Please, please don't treat me like a stranger. Please. She asked quietly, her expression almost desperate in this sudden fear to make sure this wasn't how it would be forever. Her muzzle reaches out, hesitating before she presses her forehead against Jane's, eyes squeezing shut to keep the tremble that threatened to reveal itself. You're the first person on this planet to take the time to help me, get to know me. I may have other friends now, but we're family Jane . . . and I don't want to give that . . . give you up. Can we please work through this?
FROM THE MOUTH INSIDE THE MIND
@Jane Notes:: Veil broke <3
Breathin' in you give me air, I'm living on your solar flare
Could you be my super nova girl?
What does she see when she looks at me? Jane peered at the Nebula and struggled not to feel like she was dying. She knew that she did not imagine the awkwardness between them, as she remembered how Veil was and how much she leaned into the emotions of others. She remembered how Veil had tended to know Jane better than she knew herself; the comfort of the mare’s nose pressing into Jane’s side after her aunt had kicked her out. She remembered the cold heat of the sun on her back, remembered trying to balance the emotions so that she could protect Veil, even back then.
Jane had always wanted to protect her. It was her purpose, Jane had come upon after a short while. Why else would the Gods send a walking nebula across her path, why had their personalities blended so effortlessly? Jane could hardly look at pictures of herself anymore, let alone the mirror. How could she express it to Veil, just how she didn’t know herself anymore.
Veil spoke of Torielle with such wonder and innocence, as she had always been. How could things ever be okay again- now that Jane was this collection of identities that would end at the end of her life. Nothing would survive her. But Veil will survive you, a voice whispered in the back of her mind, She will outlive you and you will become but another star in her sky.
“Of course. I’m glad you found her.” Jane stopped herself before she could say, I’d like to meet her? Would the kind Torielle who had helped Veil not want to strike Jane for her abandonment.
The two of them went to the tree with their teas and they sat beneath its shade. Spring heat rested on the grass but Jane felt completely numb beneath her severe emotional turmoil. But it was Veil who broke, who spoke quickly in all of those words that she had learnt in Jane’s absence. They came as a rush towards Jane, flushing through her body. She felt the ice in her body rising up, as though every cell in her body raged with fire. Finally, the nebula pressed her forehead against Jane’s and Jane felt once more the warm coat of her old friend, the first friend Jane had made in Novus.
The only real friend that had meant anything to Jane, at the end of the day.
Despite herself, when she opened her mouth a laugh spilled out. She was horrified at herself, horrified, as gasping laughter ripped from her throat and sent her head buckling forward and her eyes closing. She refused to look at Veil as this burning ran through her, unending and ruthless. Then she realised that she had started to sob- without her own consent. The bubbles of laughter became something different, all pointed angles and shards that she felt certain would bear blood.
Jane felt shame in her cheeks even as she leaned forward like this, sobbing. She wasn’t sure if there were tears making tracks along her skin, or if she was sweating, and god the sun was so sharp. She couldn’t bear Veil looking at her, the attention of someone who knew her in a time that she had had potential and been unfinished, so to speak.
“I- you still want to be friends? With me?” She shook, gasping between each sentence. True effort wracked her body and god, it would be awkward when she met up with Isaar after this. And what an impression to make upon strangers who she might meet again; a noblewoman sobbing on her first day in Delumine as though she were a lover screaming after her partner's departing back.
Tagged; @Veil Nebula. Ooc; dont mind me crying lol
i've never felt more alone it feels so scary getting old
[/b]
02-25-2022, 12:46 PM - This post was last modified: 02-25-2022, 12:47 PM by Jane
Visions of your pretty face send me into hyper space
Caught up in a palentary world
The star is struggling . . . no, not struggling. She is wilting, like a dying star trying to flare up, but instead was just crumbling beneath the lack of nitrogen to process. Was this what their relationship was meant to do, meant to fizzle out, be forgotten. The mere idea scared her more than anything the star had yet to face (and she'd had one heck of a moment earlier that day to feel Tori's muzzle simply styling her hair). She still smiles, still acts as if all things are right, gently nodding her head when Jane expresses gladness that she met Tori, found Tori. I'll introduce you some time. The casual phrase was a bridge to further promise more time, to connect her worlds, to have another reason to keep Jane close. To not let Jane disappear.
But then she couldn't hold those fears back, pressing to Jane. The horrible laugh terrified her, and Veil felt her star falter again. Had she made a mistake, was this really the end of their friendship. But then, then that laughter shifted, it changed, until sobs, great heartbreaking sobs left the muzzle of her oldest, dearest friend, her sister. Instantly Veil was there, pressing her side to the coated woman's, wrapping a wing around her, holding her tight, close, as if Jane was a terrified foal who needed the comfort of family. But it wasn't just for Jane's comfort that Veil trapped her in the embrace. She clung for her own sanity just as much, Don't be stupid, Veil chided gently, her words holding no heat, no venom, We're family, Jane. No matter what happens. We're family. Us against the world, if we have to be. Why would I ever let that go? Just because I can speak now? I've always had the basic understanding, it was the actual language I had no concept for. I've always been the same star, and you'll always be my sister. No matter what. Of course I still want you around, of course I'm not going to just let you go. No matter what, I'm not letting go. The star promised, clinging desperately to her sister, those tears of hers finally sliding down her cheeks.
So please, please Jane, don't push me away. Please, please, please.
